Moses and the Israelites, as retold by Joel

Moses was a guy who didn't talk very well. The Israelites were slaves.
Moses asked Pharoh, "Let my people go," but Pharoh said, No!" very loudly.
Moses said, "Let my people go," lots of times, and Pharoh said, "No, no, no, no," lots of times.

Finally, he let them go, but then he changed his mind and wanted the Israelites for his slaves again. And then he got his army.

Then the Israelites, they saw the army coming, and then they saw the red sea, and when Moses put his hand over it, it opened -- the sea opened, and gapped apart. They went through, then it closed, and the army sunk. So, the Israelites were safe.

M: "Wow! God is in charge of everything, isn't he!?"
J: God is in charge of everything. For real, He is.

A Regular Farmer's Market Monster

This morning, a bleary-eyed Joel came to me and said, "Mommy, I had a bad dream. A very bad dream."
I asked him to tell me about it. Here's the story:

J: There was a toy car, but it was real, and it took the kids to the Farmer's Market, and they were by themselves.
M: What was the scary part? Was it because they were by themselves?
J: No. The doors on the car were stuck, and wouldn't open.
M: Oh, how did the kids get in the car?
J: The kids had to step over the top of the door, one foot at a time.
M: I see, so the car didn't have a roof?
J: Yes, there was a roof, and the windows didn't come down, and there were two seats. Then they went to the Farmer's Market in the car.
M: Who were the kids? Was it you and Allison?
J: I don't know who they were.

That's all I got. I went to work wondering how come my kid was afraid of the Farmer's Market....and thinking maybe he has a fear of abandonment (I did have to peel him off of me to get to work).

At dinner I asked him about it again:

M: Did you tell daddy about your bad dream?
J: (to Daddy) There was a toy car, and the kids went to the Farmer's Market.
M: How did the kids get in the car?
J: They stepped over the door, and the windows were not opened.
M: And how many seats were in the car?
J: (holds up two fingers). They got in the car and went to the Farmer's Market where there was a MONSTER!
M: Ah, now I see what was scary!
Daddy: What kind of monster was it?
J: Just a regular monster.

So, there you have it. Nothing more scary than a regular ol' monster at the Farmer's Market.

Pants on the fan, and more madness of single parenting

Matt worked late tonight.
As I was preparing dinner, the children were playing wonderfully. They had taken early baths after some sprinkler and popsicle time. They were running and squealing, gleeful and...
naked.

After a while, and a couple of living room streaking episodes, I reminded them that they should put clothes on for dinner.

Allison got dressed first and came to the kitchen.

"Joel's pants are on the ceiling fan," she said.
"But we're throwing a blanket up there to try to get them off."

I go into Joel's bedroom just as he's stepping on to the pink princess card table (dragged in from Allison's room), strategically placed beneath his ceiling fan. You know, the fan with pajama bottoms hanging off of one blade.

I get the pants down and go back to the kitchen. Joel comes in with no shirt. He can't find it he says.

"I know where it is!" says Allison. "It's in my room, where we were trying to throw it onto my fan."

reading and writing

Joel is learning to read now. He read a Biscuit early reader to me in the car the other day and surprised me with this new skill. So, we are dutifully encouraging him these days with more from Allison's early reader collections (he's reading her guided reading books from kindergarten with us, etc.).
Last night he wanted to write words on paper, so he spent a lot of time asking what words he should write, then sounding them out and writing them. He wrote yes, leapster (l-e-p-s-t-r), blanket (b-l-a-k-i-t), tooth, teeth, bear (b-e-r), and we ended the night with pillow (p-i-l-o).

As with any new skill, he's obsessed with mastering it.
I think it's keeping him up at night.
After I left him in his room, he was still thinking of words to spell. As he was getting in his bed, he stopped for a minute, thinking, then said, "I can spell 'block' in the morning."

When the Star Wars and Easter stories collide

Joel was just playing with some new Star Wars figurines, and I hear... "and He raised from the dead!... POW! shoot him back down!"

Yes, Jesus was raised from the dead, but Luke Skywalker shot him back down.

Introducing, Queen Allison

So, Matt and the kids are playing, and Allison says to the guys, "OK, you say, 'Would you please be my Queen?' and I'll say, 'Yes, of course!'"

Catch-up Photos -- Random things

I'm in one end of the house folding laundry when I hear Joel call for help. This is the scene I find.

They say the darnedest things - 3 - darn it all to heck

At Allison's parent-teacher conference this week, the teacher showed me some examples of the work they've been doing in class. They're working on "phonemic awareness" (that's letter and word sounds, for the uninitiated), which includes rhyming exercises. The kids were given a list of words, then asked to write one that rhymed with the list. Allison's list:
yell
fell
tell
She added "hell"

Joel, at dinner this evening, was talking about letters and letter sounds too. We got to "D", and I asked him to name something that begins with "D."
He said "dam!"

They say the darnedest things - 2

Joel, with genuine enthusiasm when he saw that he and Allison had the same Sunday School craft: "We both have sick hearts!!" (i.e. sin in our hearts, thus rendering us in need of a savior...)

Also from Joel, when I asked what his shampoo would make him smell like: "Man. Handsome man."

They say the darnedest things - 1

I'm sure there will be many installments of this post, so I numbered it.

Joel: "Mommy! Mommy! We saw a lizard....and we LIKED it!"

Allison: "I'm sorry Joel, I misunderspoke."

Joel, as he heads to the front door with purpose: "We need to go to Target. I need big boy toys."